Love, lost.
I never thought I would get to this point with You.
I think I love too hard, too fast, and then the Love is all gone. There is no more me and you.
It all felt so good. I felt loved and fulfillment. But now I know I don’t belong with you.
The process of loving me takes work. Too much, more than you can understand.
Is it fair? No, it’s not. It’s life and now you must be a man.
It’s is all too much. Now I realize it is all a lie. The deception, the anguish, it’s more than I can verbalize. I will always love you. Well, I have to have love for you. Meaning, I am no longer in love with you. So, I realize, I need to be ready to leave. As I prepare myself to flee, I can’t help but think: he knows what is required for me to stay. You have lost the best of me. It’s all just too much. I don’t know how this can be repaired. Truth is, I was honest when I explained my disappointment. You think it is just a misunderstanding. I see it as betrayal. My heart hurts. You are here; but yet, I find myself missing you, wanting you, and longing for you. It feels like you are missing. Something has changed. And that is what scares me. You are here in flesh but not in spirit. This cuts deep and petrifies the little girl in me.
I keep telling myself. He knows what to do. He knows how to love me. He can save us. He can fix it. But the reality is, you are like the rest. What you need is not me. And at this point, nothing can please me. For I now see, you have not changed. You are the same you. But I have grown. I am no longer that old me. Therefore, we are not meant to be. Desperately, I fight for the strength to let this go and walk away. No more communication. And no more dreams of the future living a long life together. This is a spiraling ending to a love diminishing.
Comments